My word of 2016: Engage

By Arnia Kiara Oosthuizen

Every year I pick a word which I try to live by for the whole year. Last year it was Adventure and the year before that Happiness...

This year I picked the word: Engage!

I haven't blogged in AGES, because life was happening to me.... 

"Life happens when you are busy making other plans"-John Lennon.

In a car accident, in September, I broke my arm very badly. I had to get an operation on my broken arm, so it would heal correctly. I was down in the dumps and feeling very negative about the whole situation, but the later I got a Robocop-arm and the humor about it started to set in and I started embracing it!

My beautiful iron arm!

The Robocop-arm/ Arm brace

After I started embracing my situation, as well as my beautiful, recovering arm; I started thinking about what I learned and what I would like to change about my life. There are a lot of things that I want to change, but there was one aspect that I wanted to change and that is to be more PRESENT. I want to be in the moment. 

How often does it happen right in a conversation that you are not really present. Constantly thinking about other stuff like: "Does this person like me?", "What is that story that Kate told me the other day that is also about Christmas, which was so funny?" You forget to enjoy the moment for what it is. Your head is occupied with other BS, instead of enjoying the moment for what it is!

I want to stop listening to that inner voice constantly thinking of a reply or great stories to tell. I want to LISTEN! I want to ENGAGE in the conversation! I want to ENGAGE in the world around me! I want to be in the car, playing the music real loud and look with wondering eyes at the world outside. Not thinking about the great night I had or about what is next. Just being.  Just being there in the moment. 

Listening. 

Speaking. 

Enjoying. 

Simply engaging in the world around me and with the people around me!

May you all have a prosperous 2016 and have all the happiness!

What are your words for 2016?

Stop complaining and start changing

By Arnia Kiara Oosthuizen

Millennium Lady is on her soapbox again.

STOP COMPLAINING AND START CHANGING!!! 

If you say that your life is chaos or crappy. If you complain of things not going your way. Guess what? It is your fault. Yep, you heard me. IT IS YOUR FAULT! Not mine nor your parents, who abused you or who mistreated you. You decide how you lead your life after the bad times. You decide how your day is gonna be and whether or not your boss is gonna get you down.

Why is Millennium Lady on her soapbox again? Because all around me people are complaining of the crappy relationships they are in or always complaining of their lives being chaos. The same people are complaining of the same circumstances for years. Your friends' and my ears are tired of listening to the record player on repeat. Please choose a new album.

You are the one who can change your circumstances and your outlook on life. And I'm going to throw in my life quote: "Happiness is an inside job" and so is everything else! 

Stop complaining and start changing!

Painting for holiday fun

By Arnia Kiara Oosthuizen

What do you do when you get bored? You get creative (sometimes).

This year, I will have my own room at my residence and it will be a lot bigger, so I need to decorate it with more things. But decorations are expensive and not exactly what I want, therefore I decided to buy and paint my own decorations with my favorite color: Blue, especially turquoise.

Adventure: my word for 2015

"The very basic core of a man's living spirit is his passion for adventure."- Christopher McCandless

This is my motto for 2015. I simply want to have fun and adventures. Read about it here.

Happ(y)iness: My word of 2014

My motto and word for 2014 was: Happiness and the motto: Happiness is an inside job. I had an extremely happy year and it was because I chose to be happy. Read about it here.

I am impressed with my attempts at painting! I will take orders (ha-ha).

The importance of 'I'

By Arnia Kiara Oosthuizen

I, is a very important word. Why? Because it all starts with YOU. With me.

I really think I should become an ambassador for this quote, because I've been promoting it and using it constantly. This quote has been a symbol to me since my life made a change for the better, and my life made a change for the better, because I realized that HAPPINESS IS AN INSIDE JOB!

Yes, Millenium Lady is preaching again or as I would like to call it: Soapbox! Constantly, I hear friends complainig that their significant others are not making them happy.
Now, the problem is that I don't go into a relationship to make someone happy for the duration of that relationship. I go into that relationship, because I like them. It is not your task to make someone happy and it is also not their task to make you happy! You have to contribute to each other's happiness, not take it from unhappiness to happiness.

YOU! YOU! YOU! You are responsible for being happy. You determine your own future. You have to realize that YOU determining how your life is. No one made the choices for you. If you don't like where you are in life or about the choices you made: Today is a good day to start changing it.

We all have our off-days, when we'd rather stay in bed, watch movies and eat ice-cream out of a tub and that is perfectly fine. But today is a really good day to make a change for the better. The catch is: YOU have to make that change alone. No one is going to change for you or will be changed by you. YOU have to be the change. If you want the world to change, you have to be the change. Start with the person in the mirror- wise advice from the legend Michael Jackson and here is the video- you're welcome!

My challenge for you is to make you own happiness and just be happy!
Peace, love and everything nice!

Day 10: The best advice I ever received

By Arnia Kiara Oosthuizen

I've missed a few days of the #writersbootcampZA, due to being very busy with birthday celebrations that happened and then the studying for a test and catching up with friends. Finally, I'm back! I decided not to write about the days that I have missed because it won't be relevant anymore.

My mom is my biggest role model and she taught since I was a little girl that no one can make you happy, except you! You determine your own happiness. I wrote a blog post about it earlier this year: Are you happy?

I believe that every moment of every day, you choose to happy! Don't complain about the little things, appreciate all the little things! Do not depend on other people to make you happy, you will be disappointed! BOOM!

Happiness is an inside job! 

That is the best advice I received from my mother. I always choose to be happy and I AM! 

Extremely blessed

By Arnia Kiara Oosthuizen

This weekend, I celebrated my 21st birthday. My friends and family made it extremely special. I have tears in my eyes of thankfulness to each and everyone.

At my 1920's Gatsby 21st

First of all, I would like to thank my parents and especially my mom. They did so much effort with my party and with my birthday. The tables looked beautiful, the food was amazing and I even had a birthday cake! I think this was my first legit birthday cake! It was amazing! Thank you Mom and Dad, you are everything that children wish for. You spoiled me rotten. I really love you.

My aunt Debbie, my grandmother and grandfather for the wonderful and big presents. You really spoiled me in ways, I cannot ever say thank you enough!

The cake!

I would also like to thank my friends for enjoying my party with me and all the wonderful gifts I received. Without my friends I would be hollow. we had the best night and danced our feet off doing the Charleston on the dance floor!

My friends dressed beautifully!

My gorgeous sister and her outfit

My 21st was everything I hoped for and I couldn't ask for more because it was THE BEST!  Thanx to everyone that made it so wonderful and great!

Soapbox about abuse and relationships.

By Arnia Kiara Oosthuizen

A few months ago, I wrote a post about 'What is abuse?'. Last night, I dreamed that I was back in my past life. I woke up in cold sweat and fear.

I have been thinking about my past life a lot, because I was helping a friend to also get out of her abusive relationship with her boyfriend.
Abuse doesn't only come in a physical form. It is verbal, financial, etc. Go and read this post Things abusers say and do. 
Why am I on my soapbox? Because abuse is NOT OKAY!!!

Everyday on campus, I see couples fighting. My friends tell me what their boyfriends said to them in a fight and all I can think about is ABUSE, ABUSE, MANIPULATION, ABUSE....

I didn't read in textbooks what abuse is. I had firsthand experience. My past life consisted of a verbal abusing, emotional manipulating biological father. At the age of 15, on the 6th December 2008, was the day that I decided NO MORE! I am DONE with being scared. I am DONE with being unhappy! I am DONE honoring my parents, like the Bible says, when my father doesn't honor me! 

A person will never make you fully happy. The right person can only add to your happiness. You have to realize that only you can make yourself happy. My favorite quote of all time is: Happiness is an inside job. -Anon. It took me a while to realize this. 

My first step to happiness in life, was when I chose that I am DONE with being unhappy. 

My baby sister, Mieka, was born on 21 December 2008. Merely, 15 days after I decided to choose happiness. She is my symbol of New Beginnings. She is beautiful and I am glad to call her my sister.

My mom raised me to be strong, to be open-minded and also that I have to determine my own happiness. No man or friend is going to do it for you. 

My mom, the most amazing dad and sister! I love my reconstructed family!

I cannot force my friends to walk out of their relationships, sometimes I wish I could, but everyone has to make that decision for themselves. Fool me once, shame on YOU! Fool me twice, shame on ME! 

This dream I had, really upset me and I thought this soapbox was needed. 

If you have any thoughts or comments, please feel free :)

Are you happy?

By Arnia Kiara Oosthuizen

Today, I was walking in the shops and I was thinking about how happy I am. I realized I am EXTREMELY HAPPY!

Me and my study buddy, Merieke

Why am I so happy? Because I realized, happiness is an inside job! No one else can make you happy, except for you! You can not wait for someone else to make you happy, because they are only gonna disappoint you.

Not even your Prince in shining armor can make you happy. You have to D.I.Y.

Happiness is also my motto and goal for 2014. In every situation in every day, I'm going to choose to be happy! I am going to see the beauty in each day and enjoy it to the fullest. Carpe diem!

Hope you have a awesome evening, my amazing blog readers! xxx

To-do list for the year

By Arnia Kiara Oosthuizen

Every year one makes New Years resolutions and have all these great plans, but this year I'm keeping it simple...

That... and happiness. Everything I do, I will choose to be happy.

Happiness will be my goal and motto for 2014. Life is short and wasted if one is not happy all the time!