Romance was murdered

By Arnia Kiara Oosthuizen

News just in: Romance was murdered this morning when he was getting off the high-way. One-night-stand, laziness and Alcohol shot him through the window. He was trying to make his way to Effort and Time (his family). The people responsible have not been caught yet. It is a sad time for all the single people out there. His funeral will take place on the 14th of February.

Or could the loss of Romance be blamed on Cupid, because he is always drunk? And forgot all about his duties? Like protecting Romance, Time and Effort? He will be taken in for questioning for failing to do his duties and also for FUI (Flying Under the Influence).

Romance was totally murdered. Maybe, it's the era that we're living in or maybe it's the phase of our lives, which we're in? I have no idea, but where are the flowers, the going on dates, the getting to know one another, the excitement when the person messages you, the late-night phone calls?
Because I have not experienced it! Maybe it is an ideal that is painted by movies, but I don't want to believe it.

The other night when I was out with friends, a guy came up to me and asked for a dance. During this dance, I accidentally stepped his toe. He then demanded that I give him my number, to make up for his sore toe...

No, sonny boy! If you made the effort to talk to me, then maybe you would've gotten my number. I tried to make conversation, but all I got was shrugs... Maybe if you took the time to even ask my name, I would've wanted to talk to you. I should've stepped on your other toe, as well. Too bad I didn't.

I am not saying that guys alone should do all the effort, girls should also take time and put effort into relationships. I truly believe in equality. Guys and girls should pay for dates. Guys and girls should really put effort into relationships. But where has that effort gone??? Maybe murdered along with romance. Or maybe Cupid tripped and fell on effort and he is suffering from brain damage and Cupid refuses to do anything about it...

Whatever it may be: I will find someone who will try to bring back the romance, effort and time to get to know me. Maybe this person will put Cupid in rehab and get him sobered up, so he can continue to do his duties.

Surviving in a residence

By Arnia Kiara Oosthuizen

I am a third and final year Communication student and since my first year, I’ve been staying in a hostel. An all-ladies hostel. Meaning hormones, moodiness, back-stabbing, but also so much love and friendships... I've also met my bridesmaids here. 

My hostel is the home to 260 unique ladies and that means unique things happen and you learn your lesson very fast here. Here are the things that my friends and I have learned:

• ·         Sometimes it’s better to not see/hear anything (Jonanke)
• ·         Never leave your dishes in the kitchen, no matter how insignicant you think it is, it will disappear (Mart-Mari)
• ·         There is not really ghosts in the residence, but yet you sometimes believe it (Toni)
• ·         People who do not live in residences will never really know what goes on there (Hanri)
•        Never stay next to the balcony, because you will have people constantly smoking next to you and chatting very loud (Mone)
• ·         You get one toilet roll per week. TOILET ROLLS ARE GOLDEN! If you accidentally forget them in the bathroom, they will be gone by the time you go looking for them.
• ·         Silence is not golden.
• ·         It is totally acceptable to walk in pajamas all day long or slip into your pajamas any time of the day.
•        The more you participate, the more friends you will make.
•        The more you participate, the more fun you will have.
• ·         Bathing is too much cleaning work (because people don't clean after themselves) and it takes too long to take a bath. SHOWER INSTEAD.
• ·         The walls are thin. Watch what you say and keep your music down or you will have angry neighbors.
• ·         There will be someone studying the same as you, so get yourself a study buddy to make things a bit easier.
• ·         Buy some earplugs for noisy nights.
• ·         You will have a lot of friends in the residence, so doing projects can sometimes be hard when they pop.
• ·         Having a tidy room, makes you more positive and feel task-oriented.
• ·         If you go to sleep before 11 pm, people will ask you if you're sick. NO ONE SLEEPS EARLY.
• ·         Watching scary movies is not great when returning to the residence. A residence is scary by nature.
• ·         Watching a lot of series' is acceptable.
• ·         Being up to date with ALL the movies and series is acceptable.
• ·         Great food is scarce.
• ·         Having an almost empty fridge is common and not strange. Fridges mostly contain sauces and food that no one wants to eat.

·      I would not have preferred to stay anywhere else, it is so much fun to participate in activities and all the friends that one makes, makes life worth the while.

Living in a residence makes you part of something fun, you will have stories to tell your children one day. Living in a residence has taught me many lessons and how to work with other people.

Also check out my post about the things that university guides will never teach you.

Who thought job shadowing can be this fun?

By Arnia Kiara Oosthuizen

In one day I learnt how to write a press release, how to evaluate a company's website, as well as how to handle corporate people when you criticize their website, social media presence as well as their digital marketing.

Day 1 of shadowing

In the beginning of this semester, we were notified by a lecturer that we had to shadow a Public Relations Officer in our October holiday. I wanted to shadow at my mother's company, only to realize they don't believe in the importance of Public Relations... Like are you crazy?

Anywho, I had to find other alternatives, because working at my mother's company was out of the question. My aunt's friend told us that her daughter is in Public Relations and will organize something, that's when the opportunity of a lifetime came my way! Flow Communications accepted me to shadow at them for this week. I couldn't be more ecstatic! They are a company doing pure communication work: anything from web development, content, design, social media, public relations, media training, exhibitions, name it and they do it in communication.

On my first day, I was asked to fix a press release by making it shorter and write more concise sentences. It was hard for me to think in English again after being at the university for so long, where we speak purely Afrikaans. I'm sure in a day or so, I will get my English vocabulary up to date again.

I, also,  helped to evaluate a company's website, we then went into a meeting later this afternoon to point out what needs to be done to their website, the content on it, how it links to their social media profiles, etc. Thankfully, it was not my job to tell them what Flow thought and what the critique was, because I'm only shadowing. It felt like sitting in a tennis court and the ball going back and forth. The opinions in the company differed so much, one person agreed, one didn't, the other one asked Flow to elaborate... No one was on the same train of thought. Coming to a conclusion was not easy at all. I was just a spectator in that tennis match and I'm so grateful for that. Nonetheless, it was a great learning school on how to handle a meeting like this.

A selfie on the way to the meeting with this company

Today was really great and I have already learned so much. Flow Communications have exceeded my expectations on so many levels. I cannot wait to see what the rest of the week has in store for me! I think PR may be for me, but let's not talk too soon.

Flow Communications is responsible for the following campaigns:

• Nando's
• World Wildlife Fund
• Nelson Mandela Foundation
• South African Tourism
• SASOL
• South African Heart Association;
• and many, many more!

So yes, I'm very privileged to be shadowing here. They mean business!

Peace out 'til next time!

What to do when a date goes SOUTH

By Arnia Kiara Oosthuizen

Has your face ever been like this on a date?

Why am I doing this to myself-face

Say what-face

You're kidding-face

This ain't gonna work-face

Kill me, you're boring-face

Yeah, so we all know that dating can be hard and that it doesn't always go the way we planned or the person was a complete ______. Fill in any word you wish.
I have had many bad dates, where I wish I had Harry Potter's invisible cloak, so I could just disappear, but unfortunately I don't.
Many times, I was forced to ditch the guy and run for it. Apparently, there are better ways of getting rid of the person. I asked a few people for their advice on what you shouldn't do on a date and I turned it around, into what you should do, when trying to get rid of your date.

What to do when the date is going SOUTH

• Honesty is the best policy: tell them you are a serial killer, it will shock them, and afterward they will run away, screaming.
• Plot your ex's death loudly in front of date (Karen du Toit)
• Urgently, jump up and scream you have to go and wash your gold fish (Leanle)
• Eat Buffalo Wings (Leanle),but I'll add: smudge it all over your face and smile with a mouthful of food.
• Spray on so much perfume, that he'll need a gas-mask.
• Have a friend on SOS-call, talking flirty to friend on phone, in front of date. (Jonanke)
• Dig for treasure in your nose. (Ruan)
• Have a few personalities, but just don't be yourself! (Francois & Ruan)
• Flirt with your waiter. (Mizan)
• 'Accidentally' get your food all over him (Mizan)
• Brag about how awesome you are. (Mauruschka)
• Forget all your manners. (Mauruschka)
• Whisper loudly all the things that your date is doing wrong and talk to him/her like nothing is wrong.
• Run into the wall and sit down like nothing happened.
• Laugh uncontrollably, when your date is quiet/saying nothing
• Tell your date that there are more squid than fish in the ocean and walk away.
• Tell them you are a hobo and just wanted free food *walk away.
• Scream at him/her that you will not change for him *run away.
• Last but definitely not least: Climb through the bathroom window and disappear

Some frogs aren't even worth kissing and you should abort mission, while you still can.

Please tell me about the bad dates you had, I would love to hear them!

Power of words

By Arnia Kiara Oosthuizen

The power of words are amazing.

Quote in a coffee shop

The reason why I say that words are amazing is because of the power it has.
The other day, I had an interview to work at the Aardklop Music Festival, here in South-Africa. It wasn't really an interview because the people already know me, so we just started talking about random things. The discussion ended up with the power of words.

The manager said that words can either get you this job or it cannot. That got me thinking about the power of words.

The way how they can cut like knives. The way they can make your day.

Words can start a relationship. Words can end it. Words can start a war or end it.

I have always loved words and the way how you can make art with them and how you can write magic in the form of a book. I, myself, could never really find the right words to say or write to make magic, but I really love reading and how every author has his own voice and his own magic in his books, but still using the same words. I love reading poems, where the words have so many meanings. MAGIC!

But words can also cut like knives and somehow you never quite forget the knives that stabbed you. I still remember how people bullied me in primary school, which is quite a few years ago. I still remember how people said mean things to me in high school and also at university.

Lately, I needed a lot of inspiration to get me through my studies because it got quite tough with studies and the picture above, which I took in the coffee shop, gave me the needed inspiration to keep on going. Yes, these words inspired me to STOP GIVING UP!!!!!

Go and watch this video on Youtube, because it perfectly describes what I mean in a song!!!

We should be careful with what we say because it has so much power. We should rather try to make magic with our words and make it art, instead of hurting people.

Funnies while working at Aardklop

By Arnia Kiara Oosthuizen

Aardklop is an Afrikaans musical festival here in South-Africa. But with every music festival, you get funny people, drunk people, angry people, they come in all shapes and sizes.

The awesome team I worked with

As part of our work, we were responsible for tearing the tickets, keeping late-comers out and showing people to their seats. Easy enough... That's what we thought...

One day, we were sitting outside while a show was already on for an half an hour, when a woman came storming up to us, furious. She was demanding that we let her in, but our job is to keep late-comers out. Her excuse is that we were supposed to fetch her in the car before the show started. Like I said our jobs entitled us to tear tickets, keep late-comers out and show people to their seats. Not to fetch them in their cars. My mom also taught me not to go close to strangers when they are sitting in their cars, that's when kidnappings happen...

My favorite artist, Karen Zoid

We also worked at the festival's main stage. We were responsible for checking the tickets of the Golden Circle audience. A man, three times my size, came to us, saying he wants to be in the Golden Circle, because the people at the gate charged him double for normal standing tickets. I told him that we cannot do that, because the people who actually paid for it, had allocated seats. He then attempted to climp over the rails. I went to stand in front of him and said, "Try me!", he then looked me deep in the eye and scoured away. I was scared of this huge man, but apparently I'm fierce.

We made the newspapers

The artist, Steve Hofmeyr, is very popular under the ladies for some unknown reason. The shows usually started at 7 pm at the main stage, but on the day of Steve Hofmeyr's performance, the ladies already took their seats from 9 am that morning. When he finally came on stage, the ladies went wild! They were screaming like crazy people. He then decided to walk between the audience, the ladies were touching him and when he came back on stage, he easily had 10 bras in his hands and over his head.

My friend, who worked with another group, was assaulted by a woman. She was an hour late for her show, but still demanded to be let in. The poor guy had a black eye to show for his bravery.

All in all, it was loads of fun. It was the best holiday job I ever had and the payment was also not bad. I, also met great people who became friends.

Feeling like a broken toy

By Arnia Kiara Oosthuizen

As I have mentioned before in a previous blog post, I struggle with stut-stut-stuttering.

Super Girl

Recently, my stuttering started up again. My stuttering is stress-related and I believe it started again after my vacation job at a shoe shop. The job was stressful in its own way, with a boss who was very demanding and she worked on every wrong nerve there is.

I hate it when I stutter (well, who doesn't?), because people sometimes lack patience when I start to stutter and will lose interest in what I'm about to say. Sometimes I want to tell people something, but decide against it, because I stutter. I REALLY HATE TO STUTTER! I feel like a broken toy.

Every rose has its thorn. Mine is stuttering. I once met this beautiful girl, but she was like drop-dead-gorgeous and she had the best personality anyone could ask for, but her thorn was that her IQ was so low, she struggled to pass in school. She is an inspiration to me, because she now owns her own beauty salon and she is doing well for herself.

Every time, I start stuttering again, I try to think of everything my speech therapists have taught me. Yes, it works sometimes, but mostly I have to take a deep breath and try again.

There are different types of stuttering. Some people stutter on sounds, some on words and like me, on sentences. Yes, a person can stutter on sentences. I'm one of those.

There are also different triggers for stuttering. Mine is stress-related and will come and go. Other people stutter permanently.

It is not easy to be a stutterer, but everyone has to embrace their thorn and make it part of their self-confidence. I am Super Girl. Nothing will get me down, not even my stuttering.

What is your thorn?

How retail works in a shoe shop

By Arnia Kiara Oosthuizen

Many people walk into a shop, buy the shoes and walk out but never realize what is going on in the background. I thought I would share this with you, because it was even interesting to me. And like I have mentioned before I'm working in a shoe shop for the holiday season to earn some extra money for 2014. 

Kgomotso and me working

There are so many things that it is even hard to know where to start.

If a customer comes with a shoe that was on the display and asks for a size, there is a sticker in the shoe. The sticker has a name on it and the bar code. Then we look on the boxes for the same name, then we have found the shoe! So next time, you're looking for a shoe, you can do it yourself ;).

Shoes sell so fast that everyday we have to put new stock in the empty spaces. Every second day we receive more or less 90-100 boxes, which can almost immediately be put into the empty spaces. A box contains more or less 12-20 shoe boxes. That means 1200-2000 shoe boxes that we get every 2 days.

Customers make it hard when they put the shoes back in the wrong places, because there is so many types of shoes. If a customer puts the shoes in the wrong place, we struggle to find it when it was supposed to be in the assigned row, but it's not there. The shoes can sometimes get lost that we only find it months later.

Also, because we sell so many shoes, the shop's shelves looks different almost everyday, because we have to make space for the new boxes and also fill in the spaces. It is hard work, because if you move one row, you have to move ALL THE ROWS! No spaces are allowed!

Tomy takkies

The photo above shows Tomy takkies. They are very popular and everyone from young to old can wear them and not look strange. Well, these shoes are so popular that they make 40% of our budget. Yes, that is how popular they are.

Customers love to ask if we have any more stock in the stockroom and they hate it if you say no, because you didn't even go and check, but what they don't know is that we work day in and day out in that store and we pretty much now the store in and out. But sometimes I can see that the people are not nice so I sometimes just pretend to go in there, wait a while and go out again, telling them there is nothing. I know it is wrong of me, but like people always say: "The customer is always right".

I always laugh at the families coming into the store. The dads usually goes and sits on the nearest bench they can find in the store. The moms usually run around and try to find shoes even for the husbands. And the children usually run around and play games. The best is when the wives asks how the shoe looks to their husbands, the reply is always: "It looks fine, honey, buy it so we can go." MEN DO NOT LIKE SHOPPING!

Customers also ask why we do not extend the mall's trading hours. Let me tell you why, You may be with your family in the mall, shopping. But, we have lives and families as well, so we would like to see them before 12 o' clock at night. The hours are there to accommodate the employees.

The next time you walk in to a store, please be friendly to the shop assistants. We really appreciate it to be greeted friendly. We are also people. We also have feelings.

Also, see my post For the love of SHOES!!!!!

Please feel free to leave a comment. Tell me what store has the best customer service and what you as consumer expect from people working in stores?

My ideal man and relationship

By Arnia Kiara Oosthuizen

As per request...

Since I was a little girl, I have been dreaming about my Prince Charming (like every other girl). Every tale had a Knight in shining armor, but a knight in shining armor never had his metal/mettle tested. 

My ideal man:

• Must have a sense of humor the same as mine, so we can laugh together.
• Trust, trust, TRUST!!!! 
• Must be confident and trusting of me. If I am in the relationship, I will not cheat.
• Must have an EQ (Emotional Intelligence).
• Must treat his family and pets in a nice way, it says a lot about the person how they treat pets and family.
• Must spoil me in non-expensive ways. ( Show up at my residence with coffee, write love letters, cut my bread/pancakes in heart-shapes, make me dinner, sing to me, even if he is false)

1. Expensive gifts has no effect on me and will not win me over.
2. My love language is Affection- win me over with affection.

• Time. He and I must always make time for each other. It will be called US-TIME!
• Looks do not matter! Looks won't make me happy or keep me warm at night.
• He must be chivalrous. And no, chivalry is not dead! Opening doors and those little details, do indeed count.
• He must adore me.
• He must be my best friend, as well as my man.

My ideal relationship:

1. Do fun stuff together.
2. Never have a hassle to make time for one another.
3. Have inside jokes and lots of them.
4. Spoil each other without expecting something back.
5. Be able to talk openly with each other about everything.
6. Must enjoy life.
7. Have a easy-going attitude about life and love and be CHILLED!
8. We must be able to talk for hours about everything and nothing.
9. We must love each other in spite of our faults and differences.
10. And they lived happily ever after...

THE END.

Also, read my post-Experiences on dating

Please feel free to leave a comment :)

What is abuse?

By Arnia Kiara Oosthuizen

Soapbox Saturday.

Everyday on campus I see different forms of abuse. I see it when couples are fighting, when I hear about arguments my friends and their boyfriends had.

Abuse doesn't come in just a physical abuse form, but in many other forms. I read this wonderful article that defined most of the forms, which abuse comes in. Things abusers say and do. Click on this link to see the article.

SPCA- Beautiful poodle saved from abusive home

Abuse is not okay! The person who is abusing you will not change! EVER! No matter what they promise or do, a leopard never changes its spots. I speak out of experience and I definitely got the T-shirt.

If you are in an abusive relationship or know someone who is, here is Contacts to assist you.

Please feel free to leave a comment :)

How NOT to fall asleep in class

By Arnia Kiara Oosthuizen

It is sometimes very hard NOT to fall asleep in class, especially when your lecturer/professor has a one tone voice or they are simply just boring. I still struggle with staying awake in class and my Creative Writing professor started calling me Sleeping Beauty.

My tired roommate after a good night out

Here are some tips to try and stay awake:

• Take ice cold water with you to class and drink it when you are starting to fall asleep.
• Eat in apple in class. It has the same effect as caffeine.
• Try to write down every single word the lecturer/professor says, if they are slow it will be easy, if they talk fast, good luck!
• Stare at someone in your class, until they look back and continue staring. See how long it takes to creep them out or make them shift in their seat. If they continue staring at you, ABORT MISSION!
• Ask irrelevant questions and see how the lecturer reacts.
• Try and draw your lecturer, no matter how bad you are.
• Text everyone you know in class and see who forgot to put their phone on silent.
• Click your pen to irritate people and see who tells you to stop first.
• Hum your favorite tune and enjoy the dirty looks.
• If this didn't help, take a nap. The lecturer must then be really boring!

The things I learnt in my residence

By Arnia Kiara Oosthuizen

Open day at the residence

I stay in a very awesome hostel/residence. From my first year, up until now, I have learned a lot about staying in a residence.

• You get one toilet roll per week. TOILET ROLLS ARE GOLDEN! If you accidentally forget them in the bathroom, they will be gone by the time you go looking for them.
• Silence is not golden.
• It is totally acceptable to walk in pajamas all day long or slip into your pajamas any time of the day.
• Bathing is too much cleaning work (because people don't clean after themselves) and it takes too long to take a bath. SHOWER INSTEAD.
• The walls are thin. Watch what you say and keep your music down or you will have angry neighbors.
• There will be someone studying the same as you, so get yourself a study buddy to make things a bit easier.
• Buy some earplugs for noisy nights, when you would like to get some quality sleep.
• You will have a lot of friends, who stay in the residence, so doing projects can sometimes be hard when they pop in the whole time, get a lock for your door or a DO NOT DISTURB SIGN.
• Keep your room tidy, because you never know, who's gonna pop in.
• Having a tidy room, makes you more positive and feel task-oriented.
• If you go to sleep before 11 pm, people will ask you if you're sick. NO ONE SLEEPS EARLY.
• Watching scary movies is not great when returning to the residence. A residence is scary by nature.
• Watching a lot of series' is acceptable.
• Being up to date with ALL the movies and series is acceptable.
• Great food is scarce, mediocre food is normal.
• Having an almost empty fridge is common and not strange. Fridges mostly contain sauces and food that no one wants to eat.
• I would not have preferred to stay anywhere else, it is so much fun to participate in activities and all the friends one makes, makes life worth the while.

Living in a residence helps one make friends easily, but you are also part of something fun. Also, check out my post Things I learnt at university.

Please feel free to leave a comment :)

The importance of time

By Arnia Kiara Oosthuizen

I never understood the importance of time or what you can do in the time that you have, until I went to university. Miracles did happen!

Never in my life did I imagine to have 10 projects to be done in a week, but then the reality of university struck me. Sometimes one does try to prepare for the hectic week ahead, but as luck would have it, it is not always possible.

My roommate didn't have so many projects, but she had a lot of tests to prepare for. She said I am crazy to study Communication and Afrikaans, because it is hectic. Not difficult, just HECTIC!

I have typed like Speedy Gonsalez on projects, which I was only able to start the night before. 5000 word research papers are not funny to research and type in one night, but I did it. My roommate had her giggling fits,because I wake up a bit late in the mornings and then I scream and run around like a headless chicken, just to finish the project on time.

My roommate and I at the RAG-farm

I made a new '8 hour' rule for each and every day. I have 8 hours per day to work really hard, then I have 8 hours to socialize with my friends and do something else, and then I allow myself 8 hours of sleep each night. This has been working quite well for me. I suggest every student should try and live by these rules.
The 8 hours I try to spend with my friends, I really take seriously, because I believe a balance in one's life. No matter how busy or hectic, I will always make time for my friends.

I have made miracles happen with projects to get them done, but I also learned how to manage my time and get to spend with my gorgeous friends.


Please feel free to leave a comment :)

My expectations and experiences of dating

By Arnia Kiara Oosthuizen

Source unknown

This song of Natasha Beddingfield- Frogs and princes, perfectly described my experiences and expectations in the dating world.
Here are the lyrics:

"Frogs & Princes"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fW8Fs6XEr-o

The in and out of dating got me all confused
I built up expectations and I'm feeling used
Seems that everybody's into fast food,
Everybody's into quick
I want some one to take the time fine dining not rushing

Now it's nearly 7:30, I'm slipping on a dress
I keep my fingers crossed, you're not like all the rest,
So when you come to pick me up come right to my door
Don't stay in your car and beep beep the horn

Baby I'm a hopeless romantic
You pick the sounds for the background to our drive into town
Baby don't be one of the traffic
Had too many nights with the wrong guys
Caught me at red lights

Tell me how many frogs do I have to kiss
Before I find my prince, before I find my prince
All you girls that are going through this
Tell 'em how it is, tell 'em how it is

Pull up to a premire, red carpet good
You take my coat, get my chair, like I hoped you would
You're funny and your flirting is really working for me
But where it goes from here
Better wait and see

Baby I'm a hopeless romantic
You pick the view to kiss to
Make me go ooo ooo
And baby it'll all turn out tragic
And you'll push for more
Back at my front door
More than I'm ready for

Tell me how many frogs do I have to kiss
Before I find my prince, before I find my prince
All you girls that are going through this
Tell 'em how it is, tell 'em how it is

Tell me how many frogs do I have to kiss
Before I find my prince, before I find my prince
All you girls that are going through this
Tell 'em how it is, tell 'em how it is

You gotta tip the waiter, that's how it works
You cant skip the starter and go straight to desert
You've gotta pop the cork before you taste the wine

is woah,
We get hooked up but the shame is
Too much connection followed by rejections
Gonna hurt a girl 'til she learns her lesson

Tell me how many frogs do I have to kiss
Before I find my prince, before I find my prince
All you girls that are going through this
Tell 'em how it is, tell 'em how it is

Tell me how many frogs do I have to kiss
Before I find my prince, before I find my prince
All you girls that are going through this
Tell 'em how it is, tell 'em how it is

Oh, yeah yeah

Please feel free to leave a comment :)